Balance? What balance?

I am about to become a member of the "sandwich generation"--women (usually daughters) who end up helping to care for elderly parents while still parenting their own kids. This brings me to the issue of balance. I used to be puzzled at magazine articles that talked about "achieving balance" with work, kids, and marriage. In retrospect the fact that my marriage seemed to need nothing at all indicated that it was worth nothing, but at the time it seemed a bonus. I had work and the kids and they didn't seem to need balancing. I was pretty much free to do as I pleased during the day. I had my small business, a great friend who loves retail as much as I do, and even a part-time pal who took care of all home repairs.

Now that I work full-time, I get the whole "balance" issue. Trying to juggle my morning sciatica, my kids' daily adventure as they do or don't get ready for school, the cats, the lunches and now this new project with my mother is definitely a stretch. I don't mind the additional project really. My day job is not taxing just time consuming in that I have to be in a certain location to do it. I never appreciated working at home when I was doing editing work. I remember pining for an office environment--the bagels on Friday mornings, the vending machine, the comraderie, the griping and commiserating...all of it. Now I scurry to work like a rat on a wheel each morning. The only unknown for me each day is how late I'll be..how many minutes after nine will I manage to rush in the door? I'm sure the boss wonders too. I hate it. I feel like Lucy Ricardo, except that I'm pretty sure she got to stay home and get in trouble with her pal Ethel.

One very important thing that I just can't seem to fit in is exercise. I have a gym in my basement but there is homework to be done when I get in the door, and then reading and then about 8PM I think about going downstairs to exercise. I rarely get past the thinking stage and my butt is getting wider by the week. Now for the next month or so I'll be dealing with getting my mother--who lives six hours away from me---packed up and moved after living in the same apartment for more than 10 years.

Yet, I'm still not quite sure what is meant by "balance" when it comes to all of this stuff. I'm busy and about to get busier but I don't feel out of balance. The washing machine gets out of balance when it's filled with too many towels. I get tired. I do find myself going to bed earlier and getting up earlier these days, but that might just be middle-age. I am glad for the most part that I've given up "dating" for the time being. Dealing with scoring dates, along with the kids, work and dreams of resuming a regular exercise schedule would keep me way too busy. I think in general I feel like a hamster that just got a bigger wheel, but I'm still not sure about the "balance" thing.

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