Jehovah's Witnesses Reported on Loewen Court or this strange little city


I laughed pretty hard this morning when I saw the headline: "Jehovah's Witnesses Reported on Loewen Court". That's right, one of our citizens called the police to report that a renegade pair of religious extremists had infiltrated our suburban heaven. You call it "religious freedom", we call it "sanctioned vexation."

I say install some blinds. Whenever anyone we don't know rings our bell, we ignore it. The kids are getting too old to peek through the blinds so we don't even look out at the front stoop anymore. We don't call the police though.

Kids in this small city are polite--painfully so. When I cover any sort of school event, getting lively quotes from the kids is torturous. They are just too schooled to make any sort of PR gaffe.  I ask probing questions such as 'What did you like the most about today's hoe-down?' Small cute child replies: 'The food was delicious.' I want the kid to say something like "I loved the baked beans but they really gave me gas and now I'm farting". I can dream.

Maybe it's lack of imagination. Or just plain spirit.  I could do with a little less cheekiness at home though. Last week, the seventh graders took a standardized math test with 25 questions. Well, most of the seventh graders did, that is. Mine took one look at it and decided it was too hard--so he filled in the little circles at random. His friend did too. Kid 2 finished in seven minutes and his buddy finished in 10. Then my kid opened up Solitaire and his friend bopped over to eTrade.

The teacher wasn't angry, just puzzled. Her focus was Kid 2's lack of concern about the test. She allowed that it wouldn't affect his grade but it was important for department data. Kid 2 ended up in the vice principal's office. When the vice principal--a truly kind man--tried to elicit some sort of reason for my son's insouciance, Kid 2 told him "What does it matter? It's just a test. It's not like they're going to show up in a black Suburban in the middle of the night to take me away, right?" And, the vice principal laughed and so did Kid 2. Talk about cheek.....

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